The biggest Poo in the world

So I thought that I would be a nice husband and let Jessi sleep for a few extra minutes this morning while I kept an eye on Delilah.  So we got up and had a nice little Father-Daughter time.  I changed her and we went into the kitchen for some coffee (for her, I don't touch the stuff).  I put her in her little seat on the counter and made my coffee.

Last night I had made some soup and we got some really good bread from the grocery store.  I decided that I would cut some up and make it into French Toast for breakfast.  I got all of the stuff ready and made some delicious french toast with eggs, spices, and heavy whipping cream.  It turned out pretty great and I will definitely remember that for the next time that we have that type of bread in the house.

About half-way through the cooking process, I hear Delilah starting to grunt a little bit.  I didn't think anything of it cause she doesn't really like the chair that she has to sit in on the counter.  I figured she was just fussing a little cause she didn't want to sit in that chair anymore.  Well, normally a little fussing turns into a wale within about three minutes.  This morning, I noticed that she didn't seem to be escalating at all. Just grunting away.  I looked over and she was a little red in the face and had a kind of concentrated look to her that I hadn't really seen before.  I recognized it for what it was and asked her if she was pushing one out.  Being a four month old, she didn't respond.

I finished my breakfast and thought that I would change her really quick before I got Jessi up.  When I took off the diaper there was just the littlest bit of poo in the bottom.  I thought that was strange for all the grunting that she had been doing until I lifted her legs to get the diaper out from underneath her.  That is when I saw it.  There was a load of poo that shot out the back of her diaper and about two thirds of the way up her back.  And there were piles of it...I mean piles.  I tried unsuccessfully to get her out of her clothes without smearing myself, her, and the changing table for about five minutes before I realized that it was a useless effort and that I would just have to accept my foul-smelling fate.  I finally got her down to her birthday suit, filled up her little bath and got her, and myself all cleaned up about fifteen minutes after I had to leave for work.  Then I had to do that task that only a parent can do.  I used to wonder how Mom's and Dad's could put up with some of the disgusting things that kids do.  Now I know.  They break you in little by little.  A little spit-up here, some drool there, and they slowly build the intensity until you have shit up to your elbows and you are washing it off of everything that was within a ten foot radius of you.  And somehow, through some miracle that is older, stronger, and longer lasting than anything man has ever or will ever create, you are happy to do it!